i know we just met, but i forget your name, and i'm wondering why my penis burns?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
He was hiding behind my bedroom door. at noon. Wearing a t shirt. And a condom. Not attractive.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Sometimes I'm jealous of turtles because they can just go to their homes whenever they want by putting their heads in their bodies.
How high are you?
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
I've finally become one of those chicks with a taco in her purse.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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