Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Seeing Grandma lick chocolate sauce off of the male stripper was definitely not the way I planned to enter the world of legal drinking.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I resisted the urge to announce that it looks like a big crystal butt plug
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
The difference in our lives is summed up perfectly in that you woke up next to a 6'4" guy with an accent and I woke up next to an unwrapped piece of string cheese.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
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