Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
I think my vagina is haunted
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
only in a texas roadhouse would someone whistle while I was breastfeeding.
You have a long distance relationship and I have a long distance snapchat sexting buddy. If that doesn't describe who we are as people then I don't know what does.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I have a horrible feeling I left my dildo in the kitchen today after washing it. This is my life.
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
Remember when you brought a guy home from the bar... to our parents house.... on thanksgiving eve?
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
just learned i can hear my fish chewing his food WHILE HES IN HIS BOWL. im going to have to call you back.
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