remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
Yea, you were talking about how you did not want to be a reindeer for at least 5 minutes.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Please tell me you have Advil or Tylenol or ibuprofen or a fucking baseball bat
You'd love her. She's outspoken like us. And appreciates a big penis and a strong drink.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
He totally fucked me in his Chewbacca socks
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
The air taste purple.
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
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