you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
Where the hell did all of these gingers come from? It's like they crawled out of their shame-caves for st Patrick's day.
We stared down the barrel of pure insanity, took more and the electric elephant god rewarded our fearlessness by giving me golden skulls and naked women crawling out of the walls. I love acid
Sunrise bitch. You owe me waffles
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
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