I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
He found my weave.. Think he'll still fuck me Friday? And how do I ask for it back?
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
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