But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
Downstairs neighbor just asked me to tell people when they jump off the balcony next time not to land on her flowers
i wanna meet her so much more now that I know she got toed in a hottub.
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
If we all have the time, and the weather permits, and you have no plans, we should have another go at Operation Get Our Carless Friends Laid. All the lonely people will be out. We can take our lonely people out too.
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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