Don't you send me to vm
i just walked with a girl who was carrying a chair down the street. apparently she got mad at the bartender and took the bar stool when she left.
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
You're the only one to love me enough for me to admit the following: Rock-bottom sounds like sobbing to a Miley Cyrus song.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
Randomize
