I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
test run with donkey pinata disastrous. broken glass and tequila EVERYWHERE
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
He's holding a pee stick. Yes it's weird.
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
The strippers who live across the street set up a decently professional stage on their front balcony and a banner for a go fund me... I think we're gonna get a show.
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