we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
despite contrary belief, getting peanut butter off your balls is not as easy as it sounds
I think we need to find a happy medium between fried food and dicks. This could end badly.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
My mom asked me if I ever go on dates. I had to suppress the urge to ask if having casual sex with a freshmen counts as dating
New guy at work just gave me a Percocet for my headache. Officially best friends
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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