There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
Now that the fun of having an iPhone has worn off I find that using screen as a coke tray is by far my favorite app
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
our landlord thinks we're weird & alcoholics. he came in to fix our broken tub and saw the laundry door on our table for beer pong, the garbage bag full of empty fifths, and that one armed baby on the doorstep. plus he saw us swimming and yargging in our pirate pool that one time.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Why are there maracas in the dishwasher?
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
So question, would you consider it morally wrong to grind up Cialas and put it in ones cocktail? Then I get what I want and he doesn't have to be embarrassed and he can win the mental game with himself? I'm only thinking of him...
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Randomize