from now on, im only gona ahve sex with my boyfriend.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
We christened the whole apartment and fucked on the balcony. It was amazing. I'm 100% sure downtown heard me climax. Now we can unpack.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I'm sorry for peeing on you last night. Will cookies make up for it?
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