I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
Aside from having sex with a rando in a toga on george's couch i think taking plan b in the library is the most hashtag college thing i've ever done
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Of fucking course I get my period on Valentine's Day...
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