That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
It honestly wasnt my fault this time. i was in shock. WHO THE FUCK OWNS A PEACOCK?!
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
Do you think you're physically and mentally capable of killing me? Because I'd really appreciate it.
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
Randomize
