is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
im surrounded by empty glasses of chocolate milk WTF
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
It's nice to see a girl prepared for the walk of shame. She brought headphones
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
I'm not sure I can continue to condone our having sex in all of your friends' beds
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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