My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
OH GOD PAJAMAS ARE SUCH A HARD CONCEPT RIGHT NOW
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
I was thrown in the air atleast 3 times by baby jesus
Doing lines of coke through pieces of licorice. Because I can
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
How are you and your magical vagina doing today?
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Randomize
