He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
His roommates came in and started a dance party in his room while we were having sex. He said it wasnt the first time.
If me getting shot doesn't get me pussy I am officially gay
I think its awesome that i just got you to cheer for sex
Well sex is awesome. Sex deserves cheers.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Letting Freddy Krueger eat me out = HAPPY HALLOWEEN TO ME!!!
You planned on giving him head in the shower?
More like I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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