jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
pretty sure I just got a "sorry I have a new boyfriend" blow job. Confused, but totally ok with it.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Well he was mad because I chose tequila over him. He obviously doesn't understand that he will always be second to my first true love.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
Randomize
