Plan B is the new Plan A
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
Let's go free Charlie Sheen and party with him
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
No one likes a giant penis on their phone screen. I mean cmon. I'm a lady.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
I wish I may, I wish I might, get some daddy dick tonight
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Randomize
