it wasn't lemon gatorade
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
On another note, I feel like my vagina is slowly being peeled off with a rusty potato peeler.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
