SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
Captain America stopped by our tailgate. He ate a taco.
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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