direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
It's gay pride weekend and Father's day.. So in honor of the occassions I am now BI
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I'm really busy with my period
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