I'm so drunk that I ordered a root beer at the bar. Whoops?
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
I was just the victim of a drive by judging in a horse and buggy.
The fuck? Where?
St. Mary's. Amish people. Too high for this.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
We're currently sharing pics of our cats. I can't wait to sit on her face.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
This is a long quiet interstate without somebody to sext.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
did you know that sneaking into a golf course at midnight is a felony? the cop made sure to tell us after she peed on the course and hit on him
My Dachshund waddled into the room carrying a rolled-up pad in her mouth with period blood. This day is clearly off to a good start.
Randomize
