therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
totally worth getting kicked out for trying to throw my drink on lindsay lohans ankle bracelet.
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
Look man, sometimes you just gotta say "Sure! Why not? I can always take a shower afterwards"
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Well my ankle is fucked up, everytime it pops I have a reminder of $200. Jager bomb night and the day we began to rebuild our friendship.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
Nothing like sitting at your midterm pissed at yourself because you put your graphing calculator batteries in your vibrator and forgot to put them back in before the exam 😑
Can now check off "Start bar fight with my dad." on my bucket list.
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
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