Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
Just left the frat house in last nights clothes minus my earings, shoes, underware, tequilla cap, and my dignity. If you see me on your way home just hit me
i wasnt laughing because you were puking, i was laughing because three yards away there was a couple seriously getting it on
continuing my moment killer tradition in the best possible way
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Me and tommy were trying to figure out why our printer was jammed, found a condom stuck in the paper slot. #collegeprobs
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
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