We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
Drawing dicks in the frost on people's windshields is a rare joy I allow myself while walking to my 8 AM class.
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I just dropped my cookie in my glass of milk and looked at it for ten minutes. Thanks for telling me you made weed cookies.
We had sex under a tree in his boss's backyard, then I hooked up with his best friend. I don't even care how I got home.
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
This doesn't mean I'm going to attempt to find happiness with smooshy dick
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Welp. It's confirmed. There is literally no lube on this entire island. Fuck me. More accurately, don't fuck me.
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
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