Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
I rolled out of the car, crawled on all fours to the door, did somersaults all the way to my room, and then I ran across the parking lot to tell our neighbor you wanted to bang him. I'm not even sure if it was the right guy.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
