I must be too annoying 4 u.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
i definitely just woke up with half of a cigarette tucked underneath my balls. Last night must have been interesting
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
Dude its 315 and I'm sitting here eating slices of cheese. Don't talk to me about tomorrow.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
Thanks to a poorly written tweet a whole bunch of people thought I died last night.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
did you just try to prove your straightness by quoting a lady gaga song?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
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