what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Jesus when did you leave my house? I found 2 bottles of wine, vodka, and a book with blow all over it wondering if I was read bedtime stories
i think we sleep fucked last night...
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
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