don't go back without me... they'll know i'm pooping.
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
If you're still awake, how rude would it be if I masturbated in her new apartment on moving day? If you're asleep, then ask me how it was.
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
Remember when we partied so hard that dude died and it cockblocked you hooking up with my sister?
I forgot that happened. That's the second dude that died on a vacation I've been on
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I'm eating tortillas right now. Like not cooked tortillas. Someone is playing the guitar. Man with bandana.
Are you okay?
I went home with a 38 year old guy in a kilt, do I look okay!
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
We are best friends because we can vomit simultaneously in the same toilet and not care
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