to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I understand Curling. That high.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Literally just one second of unclenched butt hole away from shitting my pants.
in other news, i feel like i just shat out all my sins.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
Lucky bitch I'm at work covered in Jeff pee. And my hair smells like beer because I was trying to prove a point about PBR serving multiple purposes.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
