Looks like an M-80 went off in a lb. of pastrami
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Quick, to the slutcave!
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
Putting a positive pregnancy test next to my condoms in my drawer so I remember why I always need to use condoms
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
She just took a mirror selfie at the hospital while in labor.
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
honestly performing my own hysterectomy would hurt less than my cramps right now.
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize