so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
He made me sneak beer in the diaper bag... guess who is winning 2012 parents of the year
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
