I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
We found her on the balcony debating if it was easier to jump or throw up. Neither decision would not have been good for the 91 year old below us.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Everybodys gonna want to make out w me dressed as big bird
Big bird is like some childhood daddy fantasy come true for carnival
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
You're going to replace me with a robot made of heating blankets and a vibrator?
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
