i'm sick of taking my pants off and seeing a look of disappointment on the girls face. i want her to be frigthened
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
Just got convinced to trip sit for a pack of cigarettes and a burrito. Let the games begin
He is currently tell his hat to go free. Like he has it sitting on the table just waiting for it to take off. When he's not looking I'm gonna throw it off the balcony and tell him it's flying
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
I think were only still together so we can make each other miserable
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
Randomize
