Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
you didnt know i had herpes?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
