my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
It might be the most honest thing I've ever said. ...or I've had 3 vodka tonics.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
Randomize
