omg! a creepy truck driver just made a frog puppet wave at me!!!
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
I'm not gonna lie. having my legs shaved for me in the morning was a lovely surprise.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
I can't. I think his penis is about to take out a restraining order against me.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
yes and no. im drunk but idk if im "blow marcus" drunk. call in like an hour.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize