Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
The cop didn't care that I was peeing on the wall of my dorm building... All he said was, "come on, it's 9am."
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I'm really high and I'm watching this show where Gordon Ramsay goes to other people's restaurants and just yells at them about things.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
Fav 3 1048 608 share tweet
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
I can appreciate that you picked up the hot drummer, but don’t have sex in front of my house lmao
Randomize
