I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
either way he was missing a nipple.
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Someone had Captain Morgan and orange juice at the same moment I lost my hangover and I just had to give it a try.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I cnant read. Cheetos goen. Help. Grt Cheetos.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
We were drunk having sex and I knocked over her bedside table/fish bowl and she jumped off to check if her fish was still alive but she made me pasta so it's cool
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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