In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
I just sneezed cum. He better have a damn good day at work.
He then proceeded to tell me about his enlarged lymph nodes, his"severe" case of blue balls.
How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
I think I need to stop sleeping with him. Sex with him is just a reminder of the mediocrity of the rest of my life.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
My mom sucked on that joint like a nipple and she was a fucking newborn
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
You keep making the old jokes & I'm gonna come down with a sudden case of low-estrogen related vaginal dryness..
No my problem is I'm working and its a beautiful Saturday. I should be recovering from a hangover and out golfing. Fuck responsibility. I miss college.
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