my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
I showed him my bush... on skype.
If I were a hot girl. I'd whore around, I'd be awesome.
you tried to arm wrestle for the title of "mom's favorite son"
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
If I die, I leave all my liquor in my apartment to you. Be a drunk bitch at my funeral. I wouldn't want it any other way.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
There's two sisters at this place and they look competitive. Try for a threesome tonight?
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
New rule. No seeing movies about plane crashes after killer bong rips
Better not shit yourself at the gym.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Far be it from me to tell you where you store your dildos but from an interior decorating standpoint not fucking there
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
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