This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I bought a goldfish, named it after my ex-girlfriend, and let it die. It's really the little things in life.
She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
Rule 1: If any of us dies on a trip, the other two have to 'Weekend at Bernies' the shit outta that corpse...
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
Never underestimate the power of titties
I bought him flowers and fake vampire fangs, cuz there's really not a greeting card that says "Sorry I got wasted last night and started a very sloppy bloodletting ritual.".
Randomize