Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
you ever wonder how lesbians feel about girls being in relationships with other girls on facebook? could it annoy them more than it annoys me?
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
where'd the toddler underneathe the beer pong table come from?
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
So you're mad that I let you go home with the guy with soft hands but yet you can't understand that I was just trying to help you
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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