What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
whatever. i almost had sex in a car with someone passed out in the back seat. phone's not my biggest worry.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
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