U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
You can only be slapped by Eastern European waitresses so many times. I guess they don't want my huge cock in their iron curtain
remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
It usually only happens when Im really excited. Normally not that fast. You still enjoy it?
I seriously need 2 stop fake jacking off in peoples faces at work...the I.T. Guy just showed me the security surveillance tapes.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
Randomize
