I didn't shave. On purpose
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Aunt Jean just announced that her pubic hair is getting thicker as her head hair gets thinner. As a family we are just not a people of mystery.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
for once, the $56 i am about to pay for plan b was actually worth the sex.
you better not pull some "waking up at 2 in the afternoon" shit, we have weed to smoke.
Dude when we asked him where he lived all he could tell us was "by the slurpees." That fucked up.
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
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