Do you still have your period?
we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
First order of business is dropping my 9 am gym class. I'm sweating pure vodka.
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Called the cops on a high school party then went in after all the kids ran away and took the rest of the beer. What are you doing tonight?
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
do you remember in the middle of fleeing from the cops you stopped in the middle of the road to make out with quail man?
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
The next time you fuck up, your grandma sees your dick pics
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
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