All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
He burst into tears while I was blowing him. NEVER giving a bj for a graduation present again.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
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