I told him that he could only go home with me if he didn't talk or tell me his name
I wish I could put booze in boobs and store it for later. I wouldn't need a flask. For $7000, they should do amazing things like that.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I was trying to be a bartender for my boyfriend and his friends last night, but I was too drunk so I just kept bringing them ice cubes in my hand.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
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