walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
The maintenance guy at work just asked me out for a drink. For once, I proudly said that I was 20.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I am mentally ready for anal.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
